THE LAST DAYS OF SODOM

The Last Days of Sodom

Patterns behaviors what we run to when the chips are down. When life gets ugly and sometimes yes when we are treated unfairly. For people like me and some of you who read this we know all to well how easy the fix is. What was once a harmless retreat into the recesses of the mind turns into obsession that will kill everything good. I have been very open and candid about my drug addiction because it brings me to a place of healing. The more people that know I struggle still even in my sobriety and recovery with thoughts and desires to retreat to the simple ways of life (meth). Is the more people who can help me and guard me and hold me accountable.

I have also written about the plight and desolation of our society as we know it from domestic violence from prostitution and human trafficking.. I have been pretty much on a soap box about issues that won’t be fixed simply by attacking the supply of  the sin. We are supposed to be on a mission to take out the demand. Starting with me.

I have challenged all who read my blog to consider the times we live in. How evil actually does prevail over good in our country. How men have become lovers of  themselves forsaking the truth for a lie. I have brought to the forefront in my blog issues that are not pulpit topics nor should they be. And I have challenged all of us to become better at loving the next closest person to us without prejudice or fear of rejection.

These are the LAST DAYS OF SODOM. And I believe there is a voice crying in the desert saying behold the KINGDOM OF GOD IS AT HAND!! It is the voice of a remnant few. The few that read the few that pray the few that reach out despite colossal failure rates despite appearing to lose the battle. I don’t believe the message of repent is one for the world in general today I believe it is for me and for you the believer. Are we like Sampson who slept with the enemy the very thing he was at war with. I think in some sense it is all of us.

Being in recovery is not just pinpointed to drug addiction or alcohol addiction. All you have to do to be in recovery is to have lost something which sin one sin committed puts all of us in the same boat. We all are in some form of recovery and we all in some way need that supernatural touch of Jesus to heal our land and our people.

There are things I did not write about as well and until now have never spoke of them. Like the rising unemployment rate. The decreasing value of the dollar aka yen. The fact that despite all the corrections and rate reductions property values are continuing to plummet and people are still being foreclosed and kicked out of their homes.  I have not ventured into the political arena and spoke about Gay marriage legal in six states. I have not talked about Medicare and social security crisis our country is in.  Have we not heard enough I think we are all desensitized to this message its like beating a dead horse. But yet look close brothers and sisters ..all these things we complain about we are guilty of. Yet we think we can brow beat the world with the Bible and make changes. Our actions should always and will always be louder then our words. We cannot continue to mix seed good and bad and plant it in soil and expect a great return.

I have written over the last yr of my blog about loving people. Reaching people because I need encouragement in that area. We are all hurt we are all wounded in some way. But its in our actions of love that Jesus said the world will know you are my deciples. Not in how well you pray in the Church or how elegant your testimony is spoken from the podium. Not in doing a million outreaches (but by all means continue to do them) but by your love for one another.

In the LAST DAYS OF SODOM there has to be something different about what we as Christians do if we are going to make a difference in our community family city town and in the world. We cannot just be the sounding board of change without being the vessel of loving the people we are called to change. Why is this such a hot topic for me? Because I have been guilty of doing nearly every sin known to man. I have committed sins of the social acceptable the ones we say were just human. And I have done the very grotesque and socially unacceptable. And I struggle with desires to go back to the old way of life nearly daily. What keeps me here is the love of God that was shed abroad in my heart starting with the people who met me in my junk and rejected me not. The people who loved me despite my drug addiction and the behaviors that accompanied it. What helps me continue to transform is the true discipleship of love that were all required to partake in both in giving and receiving.

Asking for help is never easy. Its easy sometimes to be fake and pretend everything is ok when its not. My ambition is to be accepted and trusted and you know what its healthy and good to strive for those things. But in the process of desiring to be accepted and trusted sometimes when I need help I have not gotten it out of fear of being judged or condemned.

Today I took a step in the right direction I am going to get the help that I need. At all costs I am going to stay sober and alive. And I am not ashamed to admit I skipped some things in my initial recovery because I wanted to fit in I wanted to be seen as healed and whole. And I placed my self into a denial state in some areas of my life to hide my shortcomings.

One of the first things I ever wrote said Recovery is a way its not to be taken lightly. And that is the realist thing I have ever written. That battle largely is waged in our minds. I am sharing this with you today because we have to be willing to be exposed like Christ on that Cross if were going to defeat the devil. The Last Days of Sodom are upon us. And I am not willing to be turned to stone because I keep turning back. 

I also expose this part of me because there are a lot of people in recovery who keep falling despite being saved. Despite all the public performance. I am not saying they all need intensive counseling like me but if you do don’t be afraid to admit to your self and seek it. Its time to heal once and for all.

I am making through this time in my life because I am willing to admit this and act on it. I am sober and alive because I have a great support system in place that loves me for me. I am so thankful there is solutions to problems today. And I am going to walk into the solutions. Thanks for reading this. I am going to take some time off from blogging. Because it is time to go back to square one and do things the right way for me.  I love you all for your support. While I am away please share anything I have written with other people who can benefit from this and please post praise reports and prayer requests on our DADDY SEES ALL WALL.  And don’t be afraid of change or crisis because its in these things Gods love and mercy are shinning the brightest.

Love you all.